18th June 1943

Friday

Up rather late, feeling very tired and sick.  Lovely sunny morning, but clouds came up by eleven.  How we watch the weather. 

At the office everybody very bad tempered.  The old feeling of frustration and helplessness very strong today.  Did very little work.  To Holly Trees to report to Poulter about my Oxford journey, but Hull came in and I slunk out in a shame-faced manner.

Funny that during the two days I have been away, there were no alarms here, so I have not missed anything.

Rain began after lunch, and the weather got much worse.  Joy rang up to say that Penelope Belfield would be coming to supper.  Felt so nervous I could settle to nothing, expecting an attack at any moment, and finally left at 4.30 “to see about some carts”.  A ‘plane flew over the Hythe, very low, and I was sure it was a German.  Called at Dedham to talk about Oxford, and saw some maps.  Suddenly felt I would rather stay there all evening, but could not hurt Joy’s feelings, so went.

When Penelope arrived, could not bring myself to talk to her, and hardly said 10 words all evening.  She is as strikingly beautiful as ever.

Came upstairs directly after supper, and worked on the photographs.  Am sending all non-Colchester photos to Godfrey at once.

The wind howling tonight, very strong from the S.W., driving low grey clouds over the hill and across the valley, reminding me of dear Wales.  Ach, Cymm fach, how I wish I was there.